


Ineffable

by lrose20



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: M/M, harold they’re in love, ineffable husbands
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-07
Updated: 2019-06-07
Packaged: 2020-04-12 09:50:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,271
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19129603
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lrose20/pseuds/lrose20
Summary: Crowley and Aziraphale define what they are to one another.





	Ineffable

**Author's Note:**

> It’s been years, literally, since I wrote and actually posted a fic of any kind, so please forgive it if it’s shit. I have lots of feelings for these two, I’m so far down the rabbit hole.

“Have you noticed that people nowadays call us...boyfriends?”

 

Crowley arched an eyebrow, turning his attention away from the ducks that he had been treating to bits of bread.

 

He and Aziraphale were once again in the park they so often visited. No particular reason or occasion-he’d just popped by Aziraphale’s book shop to complain about something-he couldn’t even remember what it had been, to be honest-and the angel had suggested they go out for some fresh air. Crowley suspected it was at least partly because Aziraphale was sick of a particular regular visitor to the shop, and wanted an excuse to kick him out (clearly making the shop reek of sewage wasn’t enough of a deterrent).

 

So here they were, at their usual spot, and up until now they hadn’t been saying much of anything. They’d commented on the weather, and chit chatted vaguely about how much bread was “too much bread” for a duck. Aziraphale has been quiet for the past five or so minutes, but when you’ve known each other for 6,000 years, silence isn’t alarming the way it seems to be to humans.

 

“Do they?” Crowley asked. Which was a completely bullshit answer. Crowley wasn’t oblivious-no matter what evidence there was to the contrary-he knew what people said about them. He liked humans on the whole-they were fun to mess with, for a start-but he also didn’t tend to put a whole lot of stock into what came out of their mouths. And don’t get him started on what they said online. 

 

Besides, it seemed Aziraphale was trying to make a point, and it wasn’t likely that any snide confirmation from Crowley would be useful. So he played along.

 

Aziraphale nodded, not quite meeting Crowley’s gaze.

“They do indeed. And not just humans. Angels too.”

 

“Well, you know how much I give a- hmph, well, a  **damn** about what they say, don’t you.” It wasn’t a question. “The whole lot of them can kiss my-“

“Yes,  **thank you** , my dear.” 

 

Crowley squinted at him. Was that impatience of Aziraphale’s face? That was usually his department. 

 

“Does that bother you then, them calling us boyfriends?”

 

Aziraphale chewed on his lip for the briefest of moments, as if to consider this. 

 

“That’s not it-I mean-my  **point** is why?”

Crowley had his mouth halfway open to explain right then and there but the Angel wasn’t finished.

“Why  **now** in the 21st century did humans suddenly decide we look like a..well, you know…”

 

“A couple?” the demon supplied dryly.

 

“Yes, that,” Aziraphale muttered. “Is it the… oh, what’s it called again-the Internet? Suddenly putting new and silly ideas in people’s heads?”

 

Crowley’s slitted eyes blinked slowly as he stared at Aziraphale. Once. Twice. 

 

“Let me see if I understand you right, angel. You’re asking why just in the last couple of decades people have started assuming we’re in an intimate relationship?” 

 

“Yes!” The angel’s face was a mixture of triumph and relief, as though he had just solved a rather quite difficult maths problem. Crowley nodded-deliberately, as though giving the query a great deal of thought.

 

And then he answered, “They haven’t.” 

 

“I beg your pardon?”

 

“It’s not new. Don’t you remember Rome? We were invited to that bath house?”

 

“Well-I mean” sputtered Aziraphale. “It was the custom at the time. They were being friendly.”

 

“Mhmm. And Leonardo’s toasts to kindred spirits?”

 

“We’re both clever and innovative like he was!”

 

“And how about in the 1800s? Everyone referring to us as “companions”?”

 

“Well we are, aren’t we? Companions, friends…”

 

“They meant in the sense similar to“Oscar Wilde’s companions”, angel.”

 

Azirphale was quite pink at this point, and where words were failing him, he’d taken to wringing his hands.

 

“So-so-what you mean to say is...humanity, at large, has-has…”

 

“Always considered us boyfriends, yes,” Crowley confirmed, with the forbearance of a weary mother who has been asked “why” one too many times. 

 

“Oh...well, then. So just us who know better then. Suppose that makes sense. Humans can be so very silly.” Aziraphale gave a weak chuckle, fishing another piece of bread out of his pocket and tearing it into bits before tossing it out on the water, where a trio of ducks proceeded to squabble over it.

Crowley’s eyes rolled skyward. Hell give him strength. 

 

“No, you twit. It’s just  _ you _ .”

 

“Did you just call me a-I’m sorry, what?”

 

“You really are thick, and that’s something considering  _ all  _ angels are thick.”

 

“Now see here-“

 

Crowley presses a finger to Aziraphale’s lips, glaring. 

“No it’s still my turn. It’s just you who thinks we’re not.”

 

“Are you saying you think we’re boyfriends?!” The alarm was evident on Aziraphale’s face.

 

Crowley scowled. “That is the stupidest phrasing of it humans could have come up with. No, I don’t think of us as  _ boyfriends _ .”

He said the word as though it was poison on his lips.

Aziraphale tossed with the last bit of his bread into the water, and sighed.

 

“Now you’ve truly lost me, my dear.”

 

“I think of you as…” Crowley growled in the back of his throat, looking for the right word.

“Ineffable.”

 

“You think of me as part of God’s plan?” Azirphale asked. “I thought you always said you didn’t go in for that sort of thing.”

 

“Not like thaaaat,” the demon nearly whines.

“Ineffable, like...oh, sod it,  _ here _ ”

 

In a flash, a dictionary had materialized into Azirphale’s hands, who fumbled to keep from feeding  _ that  _ to the birds as well.

On the page, in big glowing letters, was:

**Ineffable**

**_Adjective_ **

_ Too great to be expressed or described in words _

 

“Oh…”

Aziraphale stared at the words for a long time, so long Crowley was beginning to think he’d broken the angel. 

He laughed awkwardly, too loudly, making the mothers with the prams all look up at him in alarm. He was about to say “got you!” 

But Azirphale looked up, something different in his gaze now. 

“I love you too.”

 

Crowley nearly choked on his own tongue.

“What?”

 

“I love you too,” Aziraphale repeated, in that same, calm tone. 

“Heaven knows I don’t like the term boyfriends any more than you do. And I’m still not convinced we won’t some day be killed by Heaven...or Hell, for fraternizing...but I  _ do  _ know you. And you’re nice-

 

“Don’t you  _ dare  _ say that, I let you get away with it at the Ritza but”

 

“You’re nice to  _ me.  _ And I get to be mean to you...I like that. And I like you.”

He closed the dictionary and it vanished from his hands. He looked up, a wry smile on his lips. 

“Apologies for being so thick, as you said.” 

 

Crowley struggles to find a proper reply, before shaking his head, now trying to resist the smile that was forming on his own face.

“You’ve got more smarts in you than the whole choir of angels up there. Now, I’m famished, and I don’t think it’s fair for only the ducks to get to eat. Lunch”

 

“With you? Always.” 

 

With a grin, the angel and the demon set off, matching each other’s pace with the ease thousands of years provide.

As they made their way to the park’s exit, they overheard a woman whisper to her friend, “They’re such cute boyfriends,  _ look! _ ” 

 

To which Azirphale turned around to, and replied, “Madam, we are  _ not  _ boyfriends. Please do not label us!”

 

The young woman blushed and hurried to try and apologize for assuming, only to have Aziraphale continue,

“ _ We  _ are ineffable!”

 

And with that he lead the way towards the Bentley, a laughing Crowley following in his wake. 


End file.
